The main difference between /r/oldschoolcool and /r/blunderyears is time
Saying “yup” or “yeah” sounds more correct in a conversation than saying the actual correct word “yes”.
The fact that people who have never seen "Psyco" still feel fear when they shower with the curtain closed or when they wash their faces must mean it is an innate feeling in humans.
Chris Hanson should come out with a TV show where he catches necrophiliacs.
Suicide is self defence becouse you killed the man/woman who tried to kill you
Songs like ‘Gucci Gang’ and ‘Rap God’ will be considered classical music 100 years from now
Do the cars in Cars need life insurance or car insurance?
Its depressing that in primary school it’s all fun and games but in secondary school and above it’s the other way around
Imagine how scary winter would be if know was black instead
If Pinnochio said "My nose will grow now" he would probably implode.
There's no good counterpart to "brr" for when you're too hot
Ninjas got a lot better at their jobs since the 80’s - we have not seen or hear much about them lately.
5 star hotels should hire people with OCD to clean their rooms.
If Tesla created a car fragrance, it would probably be called "Elon's Musk"..
Only 12 people have ever been to the moon, if NASA decided to go to the moon again will the astronaut chosen be "Lucky" thirteenth?
Atheists are the flip side of fundamentalist theists and are just as annoying, if not even more so. And neither get the big picture.
America is a country, but North America and South America are continents.
It took us approximately 50,000 years of technological advancements to reach where we are now. The Earth has lived for 4.543 billion years. The chances of lost civilization and lost technological advancements is a lot, don't you think?
coworker chewing gum in a bathroom stall sounds like he’s whacking off
The new Terminator movie should be about old Professor Schwarzenegger designing a robot to help around the house just before Skynet takes over.
People say “you wouldn’t want to see that at the end of your bed,” but i don’t think i’d be ok with ANYTHING at the end of my bed at night.
They say if you're considering reaching out to an ex you should masturbate first, but this basically reinforces the behavior of thinking about them.
It'd be cool if seasons lasted one month instead of three, having three full season cycles each year. For example, it could be winter in December and summer in February
Accent is weird,you really dont know where it came from if you think hard enough
Websites disabling mouse right-hand click are most likely a scam site and should be avoided at all times.
Adults who create content for YouTube Kids section must be tripping balls on LSD or drugs like that.
Considering how many old people and babies die when the power goes out during a heat wave, air conditioners could probably be considered medical equipment.
Ninjas got a lot better at their jobs since the 80’s - I have not hear or seen anything about them lately.
Reddit is a ridiculous echo-chamber of liberals. Seeing how much anti-conservative sentiment there is, you would think the entire country would be liberals. However, they have been proven to be the minority.
How many coins are on the floor around the world? What does it add up to?
Over eating when youre sad/angry/frustrated can be worse than cutting yourself in the long run
If part of Deadpool’s powers after his mutation are that he’s able to break the 4th wall, does that mean Jim Halpert might be Deadpool?
"It's not gay if you're on top" is one of the oldest still-active memes
What if we learned new skills and language for our whole lives as quickly as we do the first three years?
Do we train animals to do things for food or do they train us to give them food when they request it?
I think the only way people get into real estate is to one day randomly decide “I think I could do that.” On a whim.
There should be a cooking show where BBQ masters from around the world compete. The pit masters choose the winner instead of a panel of judges.
r/Pics keeps flooding the front page with progress pics but people in the comments say they don't like it. Truth is, most do.
Do kids in Africa have an equivalent of the “Kids in Africa...” phrase?
Most watchers of youtube are younger than youtube itself
What if Stevie Wonder is pulling a long con and isn’t really black?
It it would would be be so so annoying annoying if if we we had had to to say say every every word word we we said said twice twice
How does r/showerthoughts manage to seem unoriginal at times yet the automod removes things with the vaguest similarities?
What if when you hurt a plant, they scream but you cant hear it because their frequency is too high/low for humans.
Most people I know dislike cleaning, but cleaning must’ve been significantly more difficult before the rise in modern science. Imagine being stuck with only a rag and feather duster before vacuum cleaners, cleaning solvents, dishwashers and the like were invented.
There should be a 1 800 MLM Off hotline just like bets off for all the people wasting their money and not seeing it.
Life isn't fair means that is fair
Ninjas got a lot better in their job since the 80’s - you don’t hear about them or see them that often any more. (Literally came up with this in the actual shower this morning).
Thanks to the word indescribable there is nothing that can’t be described.
On the 30th anniversary of a concept album about the misjustices in society, a well known politician dies.
If Trump is known for constantly using Twitter why isn't there any pictures of him holding a phone?
Does Ant-Man get stretch marks?
Do good even when God is the only witness
People who are pumped about politics should critize those politics like they do with new video games (when it doesnt live up to the hype)
Public bus drivers can drive recklessly for an hour and no one will say anything, but the moment I turn on Shawn Mendes all hell breaks loose.
It would be a lot more annoying for people to talk about themselves all the time if we replaced the word 'I' with something way longer, like 'shamaladingdong'
Why is it acceptable for non ethnic minorities to openly say the “N” word than it is for a man to call a woman a “B” word ?
President Trump is like Kramer when he went to work at Brandt/Leland in the Bizarro Jerry episode of Seinfeld.
Growing up watching TV led me to believe that burning triangular holes into my clothing while ironing was going to be a much bigger problem than it ended up being.
Bumper stickers are jewelry for cars, while vanity plates are the tattoos.
Double standards?
Pretty soon, coming up with a unique brewery name will be as hard as finding an unused gmail handle.
The first woman to give birth to conjoined twins must have been scared shitless.
Sally Yates, please run for president. - Signed, The World
The abbreviation 'lb' for pounds looks like 16, which is how many ounces are in one pound.
"No Names Please" is essentially the modern equivalent of 'Keep It On The DL'.
If a turtle doesn’t have a Shell, is it homeless or naked?
Why is an eggplant called that, when an avocado is more suited for that name?
The worst thing about refusing to accept cookies from a website is having to endure the same message every time you visit it again.
There needs to be a bot that starts the YouTube video at the right time.
Ninjas got a lot better at ninja stuff since the 80’s - there is not much about them on TV lately.
Even though we call it ironing our clothes, technically it should be called aluminuming/steeling our clothes
The English language is like a patchwork language, almost all of the words are made from other languages
Braidorade (two twisted tubes of different flavor Gatorade or fruit-ade) should totally be a thing.
I feel sorry for the next guy to post a shower thought that reddit decides to notify people about because its 'trending' then all the comments fill with complaints about how they got a notification
Maybe next time I'll get mad at her for not putting the seat back UP after she's done peeing.
The news channel is multiple “new” events that are happening. Which is why it’s called “The news”
If counting sheep makes you sleepy, how do shepherds stay awake?
Toothpaste company’s should put nicotine in the their products so people brush their teeth more!
buy marijuana online
Even though I know exactly what I ordered, getting a package always feels like opening a birthday present.
Nobody seems to talk about how supposed extraterrestrial buildings/pyramids/etc on Earth are all stone and brick. Did Aliens supposedly fly here on a wooden raft?
Youtube reaction videos are just reposts with extra steps
Its called a semi-truck yet it is bigger than a normal truck
If Lil' Pump Ever makes a clothing line, it should be named Esskeetit Aesthetic.
I can't think of a shower thought
As a kid I thought a midnight snack was something you'd eat after a few hours of sleep. Now I've realized it's something I eat a few hours before sleep.
They could have at least called him Mr. Pibb, Ph.D.
It’s ok to say “Here’s our children” yet it is not ok to say “Here is our children.” It should be “Here are our children”
The first woman to give birth to conjoined twins must have been scared shitless.
There’s a high likelihood that all presidents past and present are low-key narcissists.
What if fishes and others who lives in water could not see water but can see air. This would make our atmosphere a gigantic ocean for them while making actual ocean like an ordinary place for them.
If words had real estate values, like homes, the elite would cease to use words of their own language if another demographic adapted it as their dialect.
Hundreds of years of classical music that listeners at the time considered to have radically distinct eras/styles kind of sounds the same to most modern listeners. I wonder if future generations will feel the same way about different waves of music from the last century (jazz, rock, rap, EDM etc)
Is abuse against a human considered "Animal Abuse"?
What if celebrities sometimes purposely give the media false information about stuff like affairs and drama as an inside joke among their (famous) friends?
You ever think about how wild a brain actually is?
If not all languages are read left to right, then why do all languages use line graphs that progress left to right?
Life gives me lessons, not lemons.
You ever wonder how many cows you could fit in your room?
I am part of the universe. I am also aware of the universe. So, the universe is aware of itself.
What if i indirectly led to someone's death?
It's strange that we call it ironing, when the main component is now made of steel/aluminum
The first person to say the word cool must have been really cool, given the fact that everyone started saying it
If twins at birth were each given personalities — one of optimism and the other of pessimism — and they experienced the same one million events during their lives, one would be grateful and the other resentful - but both would have experienced reality.
I play a little game where the first thing I say to myself before clicking a link on reddit would be the top comment.
"Bookkeeper" is the only word which has three consecutive double letters.
There should be a work program in which reformed stalkers are trained to use skills from their past to become private investigators.
Bank should not be able to steal your money
How can you be banned from r/anarchism?
We allow hunters to pay to hunt down large game that is old and thus no longer a contributing part of their society, with the money going to upkeep of the animals. Maybe we should sell permits to hunt down life sentence or death row inmates, with the money going to prison upkeep.
A person who has never had to buy anything for themselves shouldn't be allowed to sign away the next 15-20 years of their lives.
I have seen way more boobs than my grandfather has ever seen.
Putting myself through school with Uber feels probably like a stripper does...embarrassed to tell anyone I’m an Uber driver....
The clerk at the liquor store who knows your face and doesn't card you is the real world version of the 'remember me' button
Most shower thoughts are thought of outside of the shower.
The saying: "Be There or be Square." Because if you're not with us, you are not in the "Circle."
Going through new posts on Reddit is like finding underground artists.
What if our whole entire universe is just stick inside some greater beings marbles like in Men In Black
The word Devil has the word evil in it
They should call potential habitable planets 'Baby Bear Planets'. He was the one with all the perfect stuff.
If steroids are banned in bodybuilding competitions, makeup any plastic surgery should be banned in beauty competitions.
The expression "I'm in my head a lot" is redundant. We are all in our heads, all the time.
On 911, people called 911
Americans are just Europeans who came to America 250 years ago.
I just realized paper view (in hotels) isn't paper view. It's Pay per view.
The worst thing about internet connection issues is that you can not google the solution to your problem.
If you’re waiting on the waiter aren’t you the waiter ?
If you PC is water cooled, but the air cools the water, isn't your PC air cooled?
You can tell you’ve matured when you look back at your past self and think “gosh, I was stupid then.”
Someone should open Schrodinger's coffin, just to be sure.
I'm going to start occasionally taking pictures of myself in drag, that way if I'm ever sent to federal prison for a crime, I can identify my gender as female with photographic proof and be sent to a female prison instead.
It wouldn't surprise me if DJ Khaled turns out to be Sacha Baron Cohen in a fat suit.
The year 2020 would have the most babies in history with eyesight that matched their year of birth.
None of my ancestors died a virgin.
Most pets don't love their owner. They are gaslighted and probably have stockholm syndrome. If the door/cage is left open they would run away and never come back. But not yours! Your pet loves you truly and deeply.
When you believe that if you believe in the effectiveness of the drug, then it would work. It is called placebo placebo.
Humans should be green and have chlorophyll in their skin apart from also having stomach
Why are the ghosts from most stories evil? If I was a ghost I'd befriend people and chat with them and stuff. I wouldn't be slamming doors in the middle of the night, in fact I'd be browsing memes and gaming.
What even happens if your parents get up to the number 3 while getting told off?
The universe inside a TV show is a parallel universe where that TV show does not exist, so the events displayed should be somewhat different than how they are.
Would a vegetarian still be considered one if they ate meat that was grown in a lab?
Why are products delivered by ships called cargos and products delivered by cars called shipments?
Having a big hit called “Forever in Blue Jeans” would probably suck at some point when you wanted to just chill in a pair of sweatpants.
I’m pretty sure I’ve never run into a zero- or one-way force field, but I can’t be certain I’ve never encountered a two-way force field.
Liquor store clerks who know you and don't card you are the real world versions of 'remember me' buttons
The government probably secretly hopes everyone breaks the law so that they can get a lot of money from fines.
A queue is a long-winded way of accomplishing one task. The word "queue" is a long-winded way of spelling one letter.
Trial & Error sounds like the world's worst law firm
If a mime is arrested, do they tell him he has a right to talk?
If the earth is Motunui, does that mean Elon Musk is Moana?
When people compliment your hair you can say "thanks I grew it myself"
If you had two magnets placed in space held near each other on a spaceship, would you go forward?
When my parents said “this little piggy went to market”, they weren’t talking about a jolly pig buying bread and vegetables.
There really should be a 24hr pho restaurant called Twenty Pho Seven.
Most of these shower thoughts probably weren't even thought of in the shower, like this one.
She might be right she might be wrong, all I know is it’s HOT. I’m shirtcocking it. 🥂
If flat-earthers were environmentalists, would they dump refuse off the edge of the map?
Technically Sacha Baron Cohen bigger threat to America than South Korea and Russia combined together
If the internet reaches across all time zones, how is it that we are certain all mods are asleep?
Quicksand is not nearly as big of an issue as I was led to believe it would be growing up.
I wonder if “the last straw” and “the straw that broke the camels back” are from the same origin
Baby, I'm coming home
I wonder how many plants start growing in landfills due to people throwing away fruit seeds.
If God existed, he could probably make a pretty good amount of money selling everyone's deepest thoughts, vices, and desires to advertising agencies. Not that he'd have to, but he could.
Does a left handed person speak sign language with an accent? Does a one handed person have a speech impediment?
Why do they say "A meteoric rise" when meteors fall?
Every heterosexual man is the proud owner of the best penis he's ever seen.
Maybe Tom Cruise isn't aging because Scientology is right.
What if the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon is being shown to us more frequently by AI software to hide exactly how much of what we see online is influenced by our behavior?
I wonder how my life would have turned out if I had grown up with medical insurance.
People who only like to pass along dirty jokes they got from someone else ... are they called chlamydians ?
People always talk about the warriors blowing a 3-1 lead but I still can’t grip my mind around the fact that Dr. Doofenshmirtz is 0-222 when it comes to taking over the Tri-State area
Is dust just flying dirt?
Magic Johnson wasted the best porn name ever on a basketball career
Using W-D40 to “fix” my front door got rid of my apartment’s best alarm system
No matter how nice I think I am, to someone out there I'm the biggest asshole ever
If dogs are not lateral thinkers, do they see your hands as an extension of your body, or 2 independent creatures?
According to the multiple universe theory there is a version of Reddit with no reposts.
When a bee stings you for no reason, what if it just WANTED to die?
I have long wondered if stealing after becoming a victim of theft is called paying it backward or withdrawing forward.
I wish I could bring myself to spread my butt cheeks and put my anus to my cats face so she can feel how it feels.
THERE S A CHANCE THAT WE CHANGE SOULS AND BODIES EVERYTIME WE ARE DEAD AND OUR MEMORY IS RESET
Sugondese Ligma sounds like the scientific name for a rare primate.
Toothpaste should be used to clean up and restore old skeletons.
Ads should have an “already bought it” button so you can stop the product from being advertised to you.
If needed, I can use my key fob to find my car. Too bad I couldn't use my car to find my key fob.
Why hasn’t anybody claimed the next presidential election slogan as seeing 20/20?
For every single podunk town you’ve ever drove through there’s at least one person who proudly calls that town home.
An alternative name for Infinity War could have technically been The Equalizer
Someone should make a bot called Voight Kampff Bot or Declared Bot that outs Reddit spam bots.
Legitimately one of the most underrated feelings in the world is nailing a handshake with someone you don’t know.
Masturbation is the sin. Why, let me explain...
Every dollar spent on religion/government is a dollar not spent genetically engineering catgirls for domestic ownership.
When entering a password, the caps lock version should also be accepted.
In born this way, lady gaga says that transgenders shouldnt worry because they were born that way but by definition they changed what they were from birth
Dogs envy us for getting to leave the house all day. We envy dogs for getting to stay home all day.
What happens if a caregiver comes into direct contact with a caretaker? Do they mutually annihilate? Or bind together like atoms in a molecule?
What if Mystique was biologically a man the entire time, but loved looking like a blue woman?
Drinking while driving is only legal when inside a lake.
When British people clear their search history, do they clear biscuits?
If DNA testing cost is reasonably inexpensive and also rapid to determine familial or parental links between detained adults and children, this should be done the results publicized, instead of separating them indefinitely.
What has 4 letters, sometimes 9 letters but never has 5 letters.
If resting bitch face if for ladies, then it should be docile douchebag for guys....
$1 for a median income earner in the USA is roughly equivalent to $17 for somebody earning $1 million.
I have definitely read some stuff that has made me dumber
The owners on Kitchen nightmares should hope Ramsay says the food is shit. If the food is good and the joint is still failing then it's over.
As a kid watching Dumb and Dumber, I didn't realize that Lloyd may have been sodomized by Seabass - but that's what may have happened
Since EU is banning memes, will turning it into a meme will result in a destruction of it?
The internet in a nutshell: "You find me offensive? Well I find you offensive for finding me offensive!"
Imagine if we could retain information as well as we retain song lyrics.. we would all be super genii
If cini-minis sell so well, why haven't they made cini-biggies?
r/enoughinternet is like r/50/50’s counterpart, 0/100
A Showerthought is just a normal thought, you just have it in the shower.
Reddit is Show-and-Tell for non-kindergarteners.
The movie King Kong is the classic case of Stockholm syndrome
Is the grass really greener on the other side or is that greener grass always on the other side of your current location?
I honestly wouldn’t be shocked if one day I woke up to read “Gordon Ramsay poisoned in hotel”
Being attracted to your own flaccid penis would be the worst fetish ever.
Why isn’t pantless pockets a thing?
If you spill a cleaning product, is it still a mess?
Man the waters hot, should probably turn up the cold a bit.
What if God is real and this life is a test, but the Bible is meant to test the intelligence of humans rather than their faithfulness and those who don't buy into it are the ones who go to heaven?
Bank drive throughs should have a pin pad so we don’t have to yell our account numbers to everyone within a 50 foot radius.
If I wrote a shipping fanfic about God and Jesus, would I be describing incest or masturbation?
My car has never seen the inside of my house
No baby onboard but please drive safely and do your best to not kill me
How much wind would be produced If every single bird fIapped their wings at once?
Why are they called hamburgers if they are mostly made with beef?
We live in a society where trust is now shown by how much you want to look through a your significant others phone.
Are babies STDs?
Will Ferrell has made a great career out of screaming. So has my boss.
I wonder how old the oldest WhatsApp group is.
Its true
No man has ever won a game of “Notice anything different about me?”
I bet the kids that never did the silver monkey correctly don't talk about being on Legends of the Hidden Temple
What's the weirdest insult you can think of on the spot?
If you tell a lie to cover your ass, its generaly frowned upon. Unless you are a politician, then it becomes, "controlling the narrative.'"
Someone should go to the house of Jehova’s witnesses, knock on their doors and try to talk to them about the great Spaghetti monster and see how they like it
Why is spongebob the main character if Patrick is a star
Justin Bieber's "Despacito" remix was Despacito 2
Now that the "space force" is a thing, is the Pentagon going to be remodeled into a hexagon?
When you really think about umbrellas, waving a metal topped stick high above you in stormy weather doesn’t seem like the best idea
When are THEY going to make it possible to screenshot a video on your phone? And who are THEY?
Anyone who says “I’d be stupid not to!” Is making a terrible decision
Is earth(dirt) called earth in reference to the planet or is the Earth(planet) called earth due to the dirt on it? If so, shouldn’t the planet be called water instead?
If we're living in a simulation, how could we access our data's storage address? Where would it be?
I immediately lose respect for people who put stickers on painted parts if their car, but I don't think less of a person if they have tattoos.
Whoever came up with the term "glory hole" missed an opportunity to call it a "wall-nut"
How do people with one arm wash their arm?